On To The Next!

After careful consideration, countless emails, conversation with friends, phone calls, talks with my husband, tears, reworking the budget 100 times (and still having it not make sense or add up), and LOTS of prayer, we’ve decided that me staying home is what is best for our family.

I couldn’t be more excited to start my new endeavor…but to tell you it doesn’t come with some bittersweet sentiment would be a lie.  I’ve worked as a counselor and case manager since I graduated from college.  I moved from my beloved college town of Corvallis to Portland take my first “real job”.  I’ve worked with some of the most needy folks in our society, in some of the most destitute places (under bridges, in seedy rodent/roach infested apartments, jails, the street, homeless shelters, with drug dealers, with people actively using drugs, people who are actively psychotic, people who are suicidal, people who are detoxing from drugs and alcohol, people who are buying drugs, people who are high……) and have seen, done, and heard things during my short-lived career that you probably wouldn’t believe even if I tried to tell you about them.  I’ve grown as a clinician because of the incredible people and places I’ve worked and most importantly grown as a human being.  The work I’ve done is work I’m proud of; work I believe in.  When I think about my career over the past 8 years I’m left feeling content and satisfied.  I know there will be a time when my life as a stay at home mom will outlive my social work career but I have confidence that when I look back to see where I’ve come, and look at the work I’ve done, I’ll find gratification in the time I’ve spent working with and helping others. 

Alas, the time has come for a change; where I continue to find myself longing to be home with my son and gaining a diminishing passion for a career I once found so much identity in.  Dropping him off day after day somewhere he’s spending hours away from me learning and playing and growing and not having a hand in that time is something that doesn’t sit right with ME

One of the lessons I’ve learned, thanks to my honest friends (most of whom are strong career women pulling double duty and working out of the home aside from the work they do as mothers) is that the only way to make our decision as a couple is to do it based on what’s right for our family. 

And so, with unending respect, admiration, and gratitude, I say cheers!

Cheers to them…to you who are responsible for talking to me honestly, many times telling me things I didn’t necessarily want to hear and sharing your stories, thoughts, and experiences.  Thank you for your fearless honesty.

Cheers to me…to us and our sweet family…to the changes we are about to embark on.

Cheers to June 1st my last official day of out of the home employment. To a career I take pride in and to work which I feel has been invaluable to shaping who I have become as a woman and mother. 

Cheers to my son…who has forever changed me…and most importantly to my loving and supportive husband…here we go…On to the next!


About The Momflict

I am a new mom adjusting to life with my first born...trying to find my place in the world and wrestling with the changes of life in staying home or going back to work...thus, the momflict.
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22 Responses to On To The Next!

  1. mertel says:

    Congratulations!! It is not an easy choice and I frequently long for a sick day. But in the end this was the best choice for our family too.


  2. emily says:

    Yay! Excited for you!! There, I commented 😉

  3. Nickie says:

    Congrats on your new adventure! It is very rewarding! If you ever want to have a play date let me know 😀 I hope this doesn’t mean you will stop blogging I really enjoy reading your blog so far 😀

    • The Momflict says:

      Thanks for your thoughts Nickie! I plan to continue blogging I think it will be good for me and I love how it’s allowed me to connect with so many great friends! 🙂

  4. Cassandra Thonstad says:

    Erin-this dilemma is one I think most women struggle with and hats off to you for figuring out what works for you! Going back to work was hard for me-would have been a million times harder if I didn’t love my job. Lucky for me, I LOVE my job. Now, that doesn’t mean I don’t hate leaving my boys on lots of days but I have learned to time appreciate the days and moments I do have with them. I also love being a teacher because although I am back to work, I get a lot more vacation time with my kids than most.

    Financially I am doing what I must. Emotionally I am in the moment with my family during swim lessons, playing at the park, rebuilding puzzles, reading books, bedtime and bath routines and more. Maybe some day Dennis and I will be the world’s best parents/grandparents by being financially responsible for the next 20 years and then helping take care of grandchildren the way Dennis’ parents have done for us. We are so fortunate in that because that has given Dennis the chance to stay home and finish his degree AND get more boy time. Our roles may be reversed, but I love that my sons are cared for by mommy, daddy, or grandma and grandpa. Never a stranger. Best of luck to you and your family. I am sure you will love every moment with Cash!!!

  5. sadie bain says:

    Looks like I might have the honor of being the first to congratulate you here? (!) Way to go guys!!! One of the fist of mAnY incredibly heart wrenching choices has been made! And that’s not to say that you’ll find the confidence in it right away – indeed it’s important to try to keep perspective in every moment of every day. But those moments where you calm a frustrated tear stained face, look behind you to see stout little legs trying their best to imitate your movements, or witness the serenity that adorns the mid afternoon napping eyelashes and softly parted lips of your little one, confident that you are close and always available – – – you know. You just know.
    My heart goes out to you in all ways good and positive! I’m glad you have faith to rely on … and don’t discredit your other skills Erin. Your remarkable capacities will soon find a way to meet the needs of others while meeting your own. Relax, breathe consciously and realize with satisfaction – you really can have it all! 😉
    Here’s a little gift: http://dailygroove.net/humility
    Enjoy and many *hugs*!
    ~ Sadie

  6. sadie bain says:

    lol – Nickie is quicker in her thoughts than I am 😉 And I agree with her completely! Please keep blogging away!

  7. Amanda says:

    Good for you Erin! My short stent working out of the home made me so much more grateful that I can stay home during this vital time in my children’s’ young lives. You will find that the days can be long…long…long…but the years are short. 🙂 Let’s plan for some “play dates” (ie: mommy sanity brakes).

  8. JosieGrace says:

    You are so right Sadie! Erin, you will find many opportunities to minister to others, even with your son right along side of you. It sounds like God has blessed you with some amazing gifts. Those will never be wasted.
    I would love to hear some of your stories from work- and momhood! 🙂

  9. Britni Davidson says:

    Congrats Erin! You’ll never regret your decision! Enjoy that sweet little man of yours! Hope you keep thje blog going!


  10. Dana says:

    This post gave me chills! ♥

  11. Stephanie says:

    I’ve been thinking about you, Erin, and where you were on your decision. I’m so glad that it seems like you’re at peace with this and that it seems like you are depending on God a ton- as you said that things aren’t technically adding up. Go you!

  12. Briana says:

    How wonderful Erin! I recently quit my job of 6 years to be home with my quickly growing little ones and a better decision was never made for me or my family! I hope you truly enjoy it! We should get together some time. I didn’t realize you were here in Portland!

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